ONE of the authors of Labour’s 1945 general election manifesto, the late Lord Young of Dartington, also co-wrote Family and Kinship in East London, one of the most influential sociological texts of the 1950s. He would no doubt be both bemused and saddened to see that, despite this great Labour heritage, the only party with anything to say about the importance of grandparents and the extended family is the Conservative Party. Where is Labour on this issue?
The Government’s drive to increase maternity leave and pay, establish paid paternity leave, extend formal childcare provision, introduce flexible working and roll out the tax credit regime has significantly improved the quality of life and standard of living for Britain’s families. The Department for Children, Schools and Families targets mums and dads with parental initiatives in order to improve child outcomes.
Meanwhile, erudite commentators see fit to tell working mothers that they are “selfishly individualistic”, because they have the nerve to go out to work to pay their credit crunching mortgages and improve their children’s standard of living.
Both have got it wrong. Their constant focus on the nuclear model of family life actually sets up parents to fail. The message to mums and dads is loud and clear: it’s your job and it’s your fault. But in fact it shows just how out of touch Labour and the experts are with the reality of family life. The simple truth is that parents know they cannot do their job without the support of family and friends around them. Bringing up the next generation is not the task of parents alone.
We know that grandparents are the most popular source of advice for new mums. A quarter of families rely on grandparental childcare. Four in five teenagers say a grandparent is the most important person outside the immediate family. In 21st century Britain, four out of 10 grandparents still live within 15 minutes of their grandchildren and see them several times a week. And it is grandparents who step in at times of crisis. Some 200,000 of them are bringing up children because their parents are no longer able to fulfil that role. This could be because of parental substance or alcohol abuse, imprisonment, illness or because of bereavement. Yet these are the forgotten families of public policy. Grandparents do not have the rights afforded to parents and also often miss out on the financial support that foster carers get. So the children miss out, too.
Grandparental involvement is a fact of life for many families from all social classes and backgrounds. However, it tends to be working-class families, those on low incomes, single parents, black and minority ethnic families and families with disabled children who rely on grandparents the most. This is core Labour territory. It is time to explode the myth that the extended family is dead and time for the party to reclaim some of this lost ground. And it is time for Labour to reflect on the gap between its family model and our family lives.
Sam Smethers is chief executive of Grandparents Plus
