Having watched the previous one-off Cutting Edge documentary, My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding, it seemed like a good decision by Channel 4 to continue to follow up what had been a well-received programme. It sheds some fascinating light on a community that very few people actually know anything about. The stereotypes which exist around the traveller community are numerous, which reveals more about general ignorance than it does about them.
The programme follows various communities, but is held together by Thelma Madine, the dressmaker to many travellers. She is a brilliant find, because she provides valuable and entertaining insights. She produces the most extraordinary dresses for special events such as weddings, some of which beggar belief. In one episode, a bride even has a dress which lights up – meaning that Thelma has to stay nearby in case is ends up catching fire.
Notwithstanding their traditions and all the fun of their various festivities, the travellers still face serious problems. The surprising thing is how firmly rooted in their past many of them are. This can be a positive thing, but sadly some of their traditions hark back to days we should perhaps be glad are gone.
The tradition of remaining a virgin until marriage was endorsed by a number of the brides to be. It’s also highly unusual for anyone in the community to be divorced. The one woman the programme did discover who was no longer married spoke about domestic violence and how difficult it is to escape from the tightly-knit community of travellers. Where do you go when you are ostracised by them? Domestic violence seems prevalent in many traveller marriages. Travelling women have two roles in life – to look after their men and to have their children. For most of the women, it’s easier to simply accept the violence and stay onboard.
The maintenance of apparent innocence appears particularly attractive to those on the right, but it reveals how some women are still treated in the 21st century. Sexist views were to the fore time and again, with almost everyone, including the women, agreeing that a woman’s place is at home as a mother and a homemaker. The blinkered adherence to this notion is shocking, as one would hope that feminism had made more strides forward in feminism. And yet what is ironic about these views is that the women dress in ways many would not associate with old-fashioned ideas of wedlock.
My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding has not been without its critics and much controversy has centred on the suggestion that it ridicules the community. To an extent it does. While posing as a serious documentary, it does not provide that much information on many aspects of gypsy life. It focuses briefly on problems related to housing, but prefers to look at more salacious topics such as “grabbing”. This is the courtship ritual of travellers which involves the men going out and literally “grabbing” a woman. As a result of this failure to highlight more serious matters, the programme begins to feel repetitive and an opportunity is lost.
Even though it tries to create some sympathy for the characters, their various opinions make it difficult for any self-respecting feminist to feel that much concern. It’s worth watching just to see what so many have been talking about it, although there is little reason to stick with it.
